Inferiority is Complex

Eleanor Roosevelt once said “No one can ever make you feel inferior without your consent”. That’s a lovely saying, but seems to me that it is also extremely inaccurate.

Obviously, ER’s words are great ones to live by. “No one can bring you down”, “Keep your head high”, “Sticks and stones can break my bones, but words will never hurt me”, ” I am rubber, you’re glue–“. These are all phrases we teach kids in the world today, but are those really words to live by? I recently had a conversation with someone who is normally very self-confident. He excels in the face of adversity. He shines in every competition or challenge that is laid in front of him. He is a very lovable, likeable person. But, sometimes, apparently that just isn’t enough. Sometimes, being the best will make people want to bring you down.  For a person who always overcomes adversity, this is not anything that is difficult to overcome. This is a normal occurrence, people always want to bring down those who are on top. But, after a while, hearing that you’re worthless becomes more difficult.

As children, we learn how to speak from hearing others talk. We learn how to do things, by watching and listening to others. So, when we hear constant belittling and demeaning remarks, it is difficult to not begin associating that with reality. No matter what the truth or untruth, hearing that you’re terrible at something eventually seeps into your mind and has the ability to spoil everything.

Some I’ve talked to say that this is an initiation. That these “other” people are testing the waters, to see how strong this man is. My question is WHY?. Isn’t it difficult enough to survive in this world without having to go through a rite of passage everytime you begin something new? As an educator, and recent college graduate, maybe I am naive and optimistic. But, I am of the opinion that you should encourage someone who is trying something new. Positive reinforcement has been proven to be more effective than negative! So, why do we constantly try to bring down, or put challenges in the way of those who are excelling?